2013/05/10 · 9:50 am
It’s our first week of the No Reynold Club on Survivor: Caramoan – 2 Legit 2 Quit, and the remaining members of the Edamame tribe are really starting to show the strain of the game. Eddie sees the writing on the wall, as the last remaining male fan and Uno Amigo he’s likely the next to go. Unless, of course, he can hook up with another girl, expose her to the Curse of Donkeylips, and watch her be sent off to Ponderosa. But would he hook up with an old chick like Sherri or a mom with a bottom retainer like Dawn? “Gross” he no doubt says to himself upon considering his options. Brenda? “Too into pig brains,” he likely reasons. So a reunion with Team Bro – Spring Break in Caramoan, y’all – is what Eddie expects to come shortly.
Cochran is also beginning to see the writing on the wall. Except this scribbling says that he now might be the biggest threat to win, that despite Erik’s abs and Eddie’s
lisp lips he’s the alpha male on the island, and as such the bullseye might now be on his back. Dawn, to her credit, hasn’t cried in a…oh, no, wait, here come the waterworks, never mind.
Erik, on the other hand, clearly hasn’t recovered from the diabetic shock he experienced after devouring those chocolate glaze donuts last week, and he’s beginning to hallucinate, stuck in some kind of vivid fever dream, a mysterious voyage. Or perhaps, to teach Erik a lesson about voluntarily bowing out of challenges, Jeff Probst laced the pastries with some peyote. Either way, he’s seeing things.
More: Say hi to your mother for me…
Filed under Analysis, Century 21 Reality, Comic Book Guy, Reginald VelJohnson, Tribal Council
Tagged as 1 2 3 What the Heck is bothering me, 2 Legit 2 Quit, Always Be Cocky, Brenda, Caramoan, Chris Hansen, Cochran, Confucius, Dan, Dawn, Donkeylips, Edamame, Eddie, El Viaje Misterioso de Nuestro Jomer, Erik, Family Matters, Fans vs. Favorites, Glee, Herman's Head, Jeff Probst, Kenneth Hudson Campbell, Lonely Island, Nicaragua, No Reynold Club, Rocky, Salute Your Shorts, Spring Break Anthem, Spring Evo LTE©, Survivor, the Blind Side, The Princess Bride, The Simpsons, To Catch a Predator
2011/05/17 · 7:25 pm
Our Redemption Island journey came to an end Sunday night, and while the home stretch of the season had been rather uneventful and predictable, if economical, we still had the chance for fireworks in the last two hours. Would Rob complete what was unquestionably one of – if not the – definitive Survivor performances, winning it all in his fourth attempt? Or, perhaps, would Matt fulfill his destiny and return from Redemption Island to become the Sole Survivor (if that was God’s will)? Or would Mike, the lone remaining member of Zapatera, the double threat of soldier and Jesus lover, reenter the game and lockup votes from his former teammates? Or would Grant, the remarkable physical specimen, go undefeated down the stretch, the jury rewarding his unparalleled athletic prowess with a million dollars. Or, finally, would Andrea prove victorious in the final Redemption Island duel and surprise us all by going all the way to the end? Well, there’s no way that could happen, right?
Wrong! But could anyone possibly stand in the way of Boston Rob???
Filed under Analysis, Be careful what you wish for, Century 21 Reality, God Laughs, LOST, Masochism, Tribal Council, You Decide
Tagged as Always Be Controlling, American Gladiators, Andrea, Ashley, Boston Rob, David, Former Federal Agent Phillip, God, Grant, Great shot kid don't get cocky, I'm a lawyer, In Living Color, Jeff Probst, Jesus, Jim Carrey, John Locke, Labyrinth, Lisa Frank, Matt, Mike, Natalie, Nicaragua, Osama Bin Laden, Pyramid, Ralph, Redemption Island, Russell Hantz, Survivor, Tom Westman, Vera de Milo
2011/02/17 · 7:33 pm
This season we’ll be taking our ‘Survivor’ recapping talents to Gawker TV. However, we’re going to also offer expanded, “Director’s Cut” recaps on this blog. So here we go. Day One.
The challenge for Survivor: Redemption Island is going to be keeping us interested in anyone not named Boston Rob or Russell Hantz. Our fear going into the premiere was that the presence of these veterans would overshadow the new Survivors. However, for one episode at least, we got just enough Boston Rob and Russell while also introducing some intriguing new cast members. We’re not entirely convinced that there are any personalities that can match up to the two masterminds, but judging from an explosive, unbelievable, train wreck of a first Tribal Council, we’re in for a season of crackpots and fireworks.
But, before we get there: helicopters! And Probst just enjoying the feel of the cool Nicaragua air hitting his face.
Read on: Phillip announces he’s former federal agent (?), Kristina makes a move too early, Russell and Rob play it cool, and the most insane first Tribal Council ever. Plus, our first A-B-C phrase of the season…
Filed under Analysis, Be careful what you wish for, Century 21 Reality, It's gross., Tribal Council
Tagged as Boston Rob, Director's Cut, dry mouth, Federal Agent?, Francesca, Jeff Probst, Kristina, Matt, Nicaragua, Ometepe, Phillip, premiere, Ralph, Redemption Island, Russell Hantz, Steel Wool, Survivor, the Fonz, The Matrix, Zapatera
2011/02/01 · 1:30 am
What a treat tonight! Someone out there searched for “benry and fabio,” which means what you were really looking for was this:
But perhaps we were mistaken. Perhaps what you were looking for was a shot of that famous scene from Lost when Benjamin Linus, aka Benry, and his fellow other Fabio turn the donkey wheel and are magically transported to Tunisia. Well, don’t worry, because if that’s the case we got you covered too.
Jumped the Snark, your one stop shop for all things Benrys and Fabios.
2011/01/20 · 2:47 pm
Well, he’s not too pretty to get arrested at least, as Survivor winner Judson “Fabio” Birza was booked in Santa Monica yesterday for riding his skateboard in the street. C’mon, pigs! Let the dude have a little fun! Oh, and he was apparently super high. No surprise there. Here’s Fabio looking distraught after the arrest:
Actually, he seemed totally cool with it.
Also, we regret already using the headline “For Whom the Bong Tolls” for our Survivor: Nicaragua finale post. We should have known this day would come and have saved it as such. Oh well. Fabio has plenty of bail money left so we better start working on more drug-reference puns!
2011/01/13 · 12:58 pm
When Survivor: Nicaragua began we were unsure if it would be able to capture our attention, lacking the unbelievable drama of the previous season’s Heroes vs. Villains edition, and, more specifically, devoid of the Boston Rob-Russell Hantz showdown that defined that season and should have, at the very least, earned it an Emmy nomination. To our surprise, we were hooked on Nicaragua even though it didn’t offer those familiar personalities (or even offer any truly engaging new personalities, save for Jimmy Johnson (who, to be fair, was not really a new personality)). But when we talk about Nicaragua, then and now, it succeeded despite having anything that approximated the Rob-Russell Clash of the Titans. And when we talk about anything approximating the Rob-Russell Clash of the Titans, what we really mean is specifically another Rob and Russell battle.
Well, hold onto your buffs, because it’s happening again.
Read on: Dreams do come true, but we’re conflicted. And what does this have to do with Freaks and Geeks?
Filed under Analysis, Be careful what you wish for, Bob Loblaw, Century 21 Reality, Discos and Dragons, Freak Out Control, Jumped the Shark, Mancrush, Tribal Council
Tagged as Bobby Jon Drinkard, Boston Rob, Elisabeth Hasselbeck, Heroes Vs. Villains, Mark Burnett, Michael Skupin, Nicaragua, Redemption Island, Rob vs. Russell, Russell Hantz, Stephenie LaGrossa, Survivor, Tom Westman
2010/12/31 · 9:44 pm
Unbelievably, we’re about to enter our third calendar year in existence. It seems like just yesterday we were scrambling to put together our best of the decade lists (which makes sense, because we didn’t actually post one of those until this week). In 2011 we hope to be even more timely, on-point and just plain better. Until then, let’s try to end 2010 on a high note with our not-at-all anticipated Best Shows of the Year:
1. Community: This was an absolute no-brainer. Far and away Community was the most original, ambitious, rewarding, warm, funny, creative, fearless show of 2010. It was just a little over a year ago when the show delivered its holiday episode, “Comparative Religion” (featuring mustachio’d Anthony Michael Hall), and we began to feel then that the show was truly building towards something special. When Community returned in January of this year it began what should be considered one of the greatest runs of any comedy series in television history, playing “can you top that?” with itself from week to week. Solid episodes like “Investigative Journalism” with Jack Black, “Physical Education” with a nearly naked Joel McHale, and the truly superb Goodfellas tribute “Contemporary American Poultry” culminated in the single best episode of 2010 across the board, the paintball-splattered, action movie homage masterpiece “Modern Warfare” (we know that we’ve already proclaimed the greatness of this episode, but it’s worth doing over and over again).
Keep reading: More on why Community is the best show of 2010. And 9 other good ones…
Filed under Best Show You're Not Watching, Brilliance, Dillon Panthers, Greendale Human, Lists, LOST, Matt Christopher Books, Must See TV, Top Scallop, Tribal Council
Tagged as 24/7, All-Stars, Amazing Race, Amy Poehler, Apollo 13, Boardwalk Empire, Boston Rob, Capitals, Children's Hospital, Coach Taylor, community, Dave Allen, Donal Logue, Donald Glover, Friday Night Lights, Glee, Hard Knocks, HBO, Jack Black, Jeff Probst, Jets, Joel McHale, Ken Marino, Kerri Kenney, Lone Star, LOST, Modern Family, Nicaragua, Parks and Recreation, Party Down, Penguins, Rashida Jones, Rex Ryan, Ricky Blaise, Rob Corrdry, Rob Huebel, Russell Hantz, Saved by the Bell: The New Class, Sopranos, Steve Guttenberg, Survivor, Tami Taylor, Terriers, The Office, The Soup, Tom Lennon, Top Chef, Veronica Mars, Winter Classic
2010/12/20 · 4:30 pm
We did it guys! We made it to the end of another season of Survivor. And we’ll tell you what, despite what the general consensus seems to be, we found this to be a thoroughly entertaining season. Filled with a disconcerting number of weak, unlikable players, yes. Lacking a truly great storyline, showdown or blindside, perhaps. Nearly ruined with the loss of Jimmy Johnson, you bet. A total failure in attempting to change the game with the Medallion of Power, for sure. An all-time great Sole Survivor, not likely. But coming on the heels of All-Stars, we feared the worst. And, thanks in part to one of the more gratifying wins in recent memory (it certainly helps make up for giving the million to Sandra), Survivor: Nicaragua restored our faith in the franchise, proving it could still entertain and astonish, even without Russell Hantz, Tom Westman, or water-based challenges.
But before we get to the finale, we need to first revisit the trend that has dominated the most recent episodes.
Read on: The creepiness continues. And we have a winner! And we’re happy! Plus, Jimmy Johnson!
Filed under Century 21 Reality, Flashback!, Freak Out Control, Mancrush, Tribal Council
Tagged as All-Stars, Chase, Creepy, Dan, Fabio, Holly, Jeff Probst, Jimmy Johnson, Judson Birza, Marty, Nicaragua, Purple Kelly, Redemption Island, Russell Hantz, Sash, Survivor, Tom Westman, Top Gun
2010/12/20 · 2:38 am
With the season finale of Survivor: Nicaragua just hours away, let’s kick off the countdown with the Final Faces of Jane:
See the rest!
2010/12/17 · 6:20 pm
Remember what we said about last week being creepy?
We’re just wanted to throw up a quick post in preparation for Sunday’s finale, so here are some very quick thoughts, with maybe some more substantial analysis to come tomorrow.
Filed under Century 21 Reality, It's gross., Tribal Council
Tagged as Carolina, Chase, Creepy, Dan, Evo, Fabio, Jane, Jeff Probst, Marty, Nicaragua, Sprint, Survivor