We thought we’d take a few moments to discuss the recent competition final that has legions of fans around the world crying foul. No, not the Ice Dancing Gold in Sochi, although that outcome has not surprisingly raised some eyebrows (to the novice judges viewing from our living room, we had the Canadians at least even with the Americans). No, we’re not talking about the world of sports here, but the culinary world, and, more specifically, the results of the Top Chef:New Orleans travesty finale.
Category Archives: Top Scallop
Under-Seasoned: Belated Musing on the ‘Top Chef: New Orleans’ Finale
Needle Point: Intersection of the Venn Diagram of One Thing That We love
We just thought of this randomly one day, but let’s just say this is in anticipation of Sunday’s Girls premiere. At the very least, it gives us a coule extra tags.
‘Top Chef’ Returns Tonight!
But this time, they’ll be in Texas, where EVERYTHING is bigger.
The big question, however, is will Telly Monster return?
Filed under Bert-n-Ernie, Century 21 Reality, Dillon Panthers, Top Scallop
Last Week on ‘Top Chef: All-Stars’: Racist, Liar, Kitchen on Fire!
Two weeks ago on Top Chef they pulled the old bait and switch and you get a car and you get a car and you get a car and you’re all going to the Bahamas! So last week it was off to the tropical islands to get cookin’.
But before they can get to the Quickfire, everyone is just blown away by Richard’s beard.
Filed under Century 21 Reality, The Sixth Taste, The Worst, Top Scallop
‘Survivor: Redemption Island’: Russell’s Razor (Director’s Cut)
Over the last couple years we’ve become ardent devotees to the concept of “Occam’s Razor,” the tenet that the “simplest explanation is most likely the correct one.” There’s a similar paradigm that works itself into any season of Survivor, but focuses less on the simplest explanation and more on the theory that players will make their moves based on the belief that the other competitors will make the correct, smartest decisions. Unfortunately, as the show as often proved, playing that way does not always lead to the best results. And we saw an example of this again last night.
But more on that later. First, (as teased last week) Matt arrives on Redemption Island and Francesca is shocked (shocked!) it wasn’t Phillip who was voted out by the Ometepe tribe earlier in the night. He had no allies, posed no threat, and basically begged for mercy, so why would Ometepe (and its leader, Boston Rob) want to keep him around? Oh, yeah, for those very reasons. Phillip may be a loose cannon, intolerable, and borderline bipolar, but right now, as Rob says, he’s a loyal solider. Plus, he’s endlessly entertaining. Back at Ometepe camp Rob breaks down the alliance, explicitly telling Phil that he’s the fifth person on a five-person alliance and Phil is basically responds “Cool! Just happy to be here! Thanks, Rob!” And then they seal Phil’s blind allegiance with a first bump, which in the three federal agencies that Phil used to serve in is tantamount to swearing on one’s parents’ graves.
Filed under Analysis, Century 21 Reality, Huh?, It's gross., Top Scallop, Tribal Council
Last Week on ‘Top Chef: All-Stars’: You’re Gonna Fry
Quickly, before new one, last time on Top Chef: All-Stars:
– Paula Deen stops by for the Quickfire to annoy the hell out of us! And, of course, to tell everyone to FRY their foods. Oil, butter, DEATH.
MORE: Mike is a thief AND a fraud. But justice is served. And it’s delicious…
Filed under Century 21 Reality, Rip-off, The Sixth Taste, Top Scallop
Last Week on ‘Top Chef’: An Intersection on the Venn Diagram of Things That We Love
A new Top Chef in just a few hours. But can anything top last week’s episode with featuring Sesame Street AND Target? Probably not!
A few highlights!
- COOKIE MONSTER. DUH!
- Elmo suggests perhaps making a cookie out of zucchini and daikon and dirt and cobwebs and rice cakes and Canadian pennies. Luckily, Cookie Monster tells him to shut the fuck up.
- Cookie Monster invokes the five second rule and is pretty much just the best.
More: Cookie Time! And then it’s off to Target for a slumber party! Bring your green hat!
Last Week on ‘Top Chef’: The Boorgerman
If you thought we couldn’t keep up our habit of recapping Top Chef just before the new episode premieres, then you were wrong. DEAD WRONG. So here we go! (note: our DVR ran out of space when recording this episode so we cannot provide our usual primary source materials. Sorry!)
- For the Quickfire challenge they made fondue! Just like a party my parents might have! But Carla was struggling and lamented the fact that there was never any time.
- Time to sample the dishes! Padma seemed to particularly enjoy Tiffany’s entry.
Gratuitous Search Term Bait of the Day: What a Croc
One of our favorite pastimes on this blog is noting the preponderance of Crocs on Top Chef, so it wasn’t surprising to see today’s search term, “top chef crocs.” But this All-Stars season has been disappointingly devoid of the rubber footwear (as well as tattoos, which had become a recent Top Chef signature look). But luckily Season 9 court jester Angelo has provided us a worthy substitute.
As we touched on yesterday, in last week’s food meets fashion Quickfire challenge Angelo did his best to make pineapple skin look like a crocodile skin purse. Unfortunately, Angelo ran into two problems, 1) it looked disgusting, and b) he doesn’t know how to spell “crocodile.” Sorry, Angelo; the first rule of Top Chef is you don’t talk about Top Chef; the second rule is that you know how to spell crocodile. The third rule of Top Chef is that you don’t tell Issac Mizrahi that Roberto Cavalli is your favorite designer.
Sorry, Angelo! No better luck next time!
Oh, and just for kicks:
Filed under Gratuitous Search Term Bait, It's gross., Top Scallop