In January of 2011 I began a project that I had been kicking around for years, an undertaking of historic proportions: a marathon viewing of Saved by the Bell complete with copious notes, thoughts, reactions and analysis. What was planned as a two-day process turned into three weeks, thanks to a couple serious snowstorms, the irresistible urge to sleep, and the realization that perhaps, yes, it was not healthy to mainline that much Screech in such a short time. Still, it was 88 episodes in less than a month, and that’s a lot of Bayside, and a lot of denim (for what I felt were obvious reasons, I did not include Good Morning, Miss Bliss as part of this project, nor, sadly, did we view Saved by the Bell: Hawaiian Style). After almost 2,000 minutes of Zack and the gang I observed many trends, themes and patterns, and probably enjoyed revisiting those five seasons way more than a then-twenty-seven-year-old should have. I hesitate to say that the show holds up – because I’m not sure it ever did in the first place – but it’s a fabric of our youth, and, for better or worse, it’s an indelible cultural touchstone. Kelly Kapowski is still my all-time number one crush, and I still despise that punk Jeff for breaking up Zack and Kelly. It’s been thirteen years since I graduated high school and Bayside is still somehow my picture of an ideal school, and I still wish that we had our own Max. The series is not, and was not, good, but boy was it ever great.
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This is how it all began. This is what is going on here.
Jumped The Snark 
