Soft hands, no mustache, can’t lose.
Category Archives: Dillon Panthers
Parting Shot: Gold Glove 1st Baseman
‘Survivor: Filippines’ – Player-by-Player Odds and Celebrity Look-Alikes Are Here!
Alright, guys, let’s try to do this before the entirety of the Matisyahu Tribe is completely decimated and all we have left is the memory of Angie’s boobs. We’ve been dark for the last few weeks, but all we missed discussing was the systematic destruction of Russell Swan and the Gang. But after tonight, when Denise and Malcolm will likely be forced into tribe cannibalism for survival and admission to the merge, things should get more interesting. So throw away your binders full of women and let’s get to it.
(Note: we want to thank Nate Silver from the Electoral Blog FiveThirtyEight for providing absolutely no scientific of statistical input for these predictions.)
Abi-Maria: Well, if the idea of the game was to out-crazy, out-make no sense, out-constantly touch your hair, then Abi-Maria would have this game completely locked up. Unfortunately for her, that is not how the game is played, and what she considers strategic, clever gameplay is actually loose cannon paranoia that verges on schizophrenia. Perhaps the reason that she keeps pulling at her tresses is that she’s trying to keep the voices out (or in). Certainly, considering the rapid disintegration of her alliance with RC Cola, her loyalty and judgment are suspect, and we think she’s ripe for a blind-side down the road. Odds of Winning: 45-1
‘Top Chef’ Returns Tonight!
But this time, they’ll be in Texas, where EVERYTHING is bigger.
The big question, however, is will Telly Monster return?
Filed under Bert-n-Ernie, Century 21 Reality, Dillon Panthers, Top Scallop
On the Last Day of the Year: The Best Show of 2010 and Nine Other Good Ones
Unbelievably, we’re about to enter our third calendar year in existence. It seems like just yesterday we were scrambling to put together our best of the decade lists (which makes sense, because we didn’t actually post one of those until this week). In 2011 we hope to be even more timely, on-point and just plain better. Until then, let’s try to end 2010 on a high note with our not-at-all anticipated Best Shows of the Year:
1. Community: This was an absolute no-brainer. Far and away Community was the most original, ambitious, rewarding, warm, funny, creative, fearless show of 2010. It was just a little over a year ago when the show delivered its holiday episode, “Comparative Religion” (featuring mustachio’d Anthony Michael Hall), and we began to feel then that the show was truly building towards something special. When Community returned in January of this year it began what should be considered one of the greatest runs of any comedy series in television history, playing “can you top that?” with itself from week to week. Solid episodes like “Investigative Journalism” with Jack Black, “Physical Education” with a nearly naked Joel McHale, and the truly superb Goodfellas tribute “Contemporary American Poultry” culminated in the single best episode of 2010 across the board, the paintball-splattered, action movie homage masterpiece “Modern Warfare” (we know that we’ve already proclaimed the greatness of this episode, but it’s worth doing over and over again).
Keep reading: More on why Community is the best show of 2010. And 9 other good ones…
Winter Cleaning: My (Belated) Top 10 TV Shows of the 2000s
With the snow keeping us indoors we thought it might be a good time to go through our drafts and let some of these long-languishing, somewhat unfinished posts see the light of day. First up, our best shows of the 2000s, which we held off publishing until we could embed some video evidence. But, at this point, we’ll put that responsibility in your hands.
My belated best TV shows of the 2000s! (in a semi-particular order)
1. LOST: For the reasons I outline here.
2. The Sopranos: The Godfather of dark, fearless cable shows with flawed central characters. Might be responsible for killing network TV.
3. Arrested Development: Simply the smartest sitcom of all time. It was probably to clever for its own good. It was basically teaching a master class in comedy while throwing out an impossible amount of sight gags, call backs and cutaways. We should just be thankful that we got 3 seasons of this masterpiece.
4. Veronica Mars: Could have put it below Freaks and Geeks, but I give it the edge for somehow making it to season three (even if that was a neutered, watered-down version of VM). I’d put the first season up against any season from the last decade.
5. Freaks and Geeks: The most gut-wrenchingly accurate depiction of high school ever. 18 episodes of achingly beautiful growing pains [editor’s note: just watched much of IFC’s Freaks and Geeks Holiday Marathon, and if we revised this list today we’d be tempted to put this show at the top of this list. It’s that fucking good].
‘The Office’: Eee Party
In last night’s The Office episode, “Viewing Party” Michael comes to view Gabe’s presence as a direct threat to his power, and subsequently sabotages said viewing party of Glee. But wasn’t Michael Scott all in a dramatic tizzy a couple weeks back because he felt that Darryl was challenging his authority? That just happened, right? And he had the same reaction to Charles Miner (the indomitable Idris Elba) a couple of seasons ago, didn’t he? And last year he grew petulant because co-manager Jim gave Phyllis permission to dress as Santa for the Christmas party, in turn sending Michael on a holiday cheer sullying temper tantrum. Which is to say, we’ve seen it before, and, we think, we’ve seen enough.
Filed under Analysis, Dillon Panthers, Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam, Must See TV
In Memoriam: ‘Lone Star’
Well, Fox, you’ve done it again. Axed a show before it even had a chance to reach its bris. Lone Star is officially dead.
But this feels somehow different. This was not The Pitts, or Brothers, or even Kitchen Confidential. This was a show that arrived with critical praise, almost unanimously hailed as the season’s “best new network show.” It had a beautiful backdrop to match its beautiful young faces. It had Jon Voight. And, most importantly, it had an original, complex story. While a lot of shows come and go, and a lot of them deserve to be banished (looking at you, Outsourced), this is certainly not the first series unfairly cut down before it’s time. It joins a group of shows like Love Monkey and Action that share the unfortunate distinction of a premature demise, depriving the viewing public of quality television. Lone Star is not the first and it won’t be the last. But why then is this particular cancellation so troubling?
‘Delocated’: Another Best Show You’re Not Watching. Unless You Are. In Which Case Nevermind.
We talk a lot about the best show you’re not watching on this blog (Friday Night Lights, Community, Party Down before its unfortunate demise). To that list we now proudly add Delocated.
If you’re a fan of Adult Swim you might have caught Delocated on a random night/morning around 1:45am. The show was created by and stars Jon Glaser, longtime NY comedian and former writer (and performer) on Late Night with Conan O’Brien. If you’ve been around comedy in NY you probably know him, and if you own a TV you’ve probably seen him and not even known it, with appearances on 30 Rock, Human Giant, and Cheap Seats. In his early days he was also a writer on The Dana Carvey Show, which was basically to up and coming comedians as The Outsiders was to young, hunky, male actors (The line-up included Carvey, Glaser, Steve Carell, Stephen Colbert, Louis CK, Robert Smigel, Dave Chappelle and, curiously, Charlie Kaufman. It was pretty much the ’27 Yankees of comedy).
The first season of Delocated comprised six 10-min episodes (and an amazing Paul Rudd cameo), and features Glaser as “Jon,” a member of the Witness Protection Program who agrees to move his family to NY and turn their life into a reality show, despite the fact that this requires wearing masks and using voice modulators.
Vodpod videos no longer available.The show also stars Eugene Mirman as Yvegni Mirminksy, an aspiring stand-up comedian who happens to also be a member of the Russian crime family that Jon ratted out.
Vodpod videos no longer available.The second season has been expanded to twelve 22-min episodes, and with the added length the show has broadened its scope, increased the violence, heightened the drama, and upped the absurdity. It’s a dumb-smart, surreal, brilliant show, capable of silly comedy, and, as we find out in the season two premiere, silly drama. It’s one of TV’s best kept secrets, but unlike “Jon’s” identity this is one secret that should be revealed to all.
Catch up on season one on the Adult Swim website, and then move right onto the new season (below!). Also, catch new episodes Sundays at 10pm, just before Childrens Hospital (which, now that we mention it, is another best show you’re not watching).
Vodpod videos no longer available.Bonus features:
Jon Glaser on Jimmy Fallon last night!
Vodpod videos no longer available.Also, Jon Glaser reads letters from his deceased father, Dave Glaser, to his father’s former band mates ZZ Top. One of the funniest things I have ever heard.
And finally, for extra credit check out the Delocated Blog and the PFFR website.
Not Very Late Night With Jimmy Fallon: Random, Belated, Emmy Thoughts
The Emmy’s were handed out three nights ago, and in the internet world that’s about the equivalent of a fortnight, and everyone who can say it better than me has already said it better than me. But, just to put it on the permanent record, and to get us ready for the impending fall TV season, we thought we’d follow-up with a few humble thoughts of our own, in concise bullet-point form:
- Loved the opening bit, even if it was somewhat of a rehash of 6-Bee‘s glee club rendition of “We’re Not Going to Take It,” a performance that we still giddily cue up on our screen on a regular basis (as well as an audio version on our iPod). But with Tina Fey, Jon Hamm, Joel McHale, Jorge Garcia AND Tim Gunn it was like the Ocean’s 11 all-star version of the original Late Night piece, and it truly demanded some freak out control. Our worlds colliding, but in an amazing way.
- Speaking of Jon Hamm, now that his comedic genius has finally been exposed to a wide audience (30 Rock is still critically adored but commercially ignored, his appearances in viral videos only legitimately reach a small segment of the online viewing public, and even two turns hosting SNL don’t necessarily make you a household name these days), can we start having him be funny full-time? He’s so gifted, and so natural, it honestly feels like a waste forcing him to be so stoic and dour and cold on Mad Men (and we know we sound like a broken record on this, but we’re going to keep bring it up until it happens. Or until Mad Men becomes a farcical satire. Maybe in season 5). Sure, he’s magnetic, sexy and mysterious on the AMC drama, but it’s when he’s allowed to do comedy that he truly lights up. But after being seen dancing like an idiot on HDTVs all across the country maybe someone will give him a chance to headline a comedy. Perhaps something in the Apatowian genre. I think that’s a hit.
- And if and when Hamm gets that nod can they please place Joel McHale alongside him? Please?
Continue: more overdue and rambling considerations, compliments and criticisms…
Score One for Gritty High School Football Dramas!
Well, if there were two good things to come out of Jay Leno destroying the NBC schedule, they are that Chuck has been brought back early and given a major push (and will now likely have a much greater chance of surviving to season four) and, as, just announced, Friday Night Lights will return on April 30. Originally, the word was that the critically-beloved, Ben Silverman-sabotaged, tragically audience-starved drama would not return to NBC until the summer, but with all the holes soon to open up in the schedule it looks like it’s coming back early. Yay! Still time to catch up seasons 1-3. And, trust me, you should.
I bet NBC regrets axing Southland now.
See the full post-Olympics, post-late night debacle schedule @ Tuned In.
Oh, and looks like I was wrong about Dick Wolf. He seems safe. For now.
Filed under Dillon Panthers, Other people's stuff, Who's the Boss?
Jumped The Snark 