Tag Archives: Tom Westman

Out of the Fire and into the Philippines: Michael Skupin Returns to ‘Survivor’

There’s a tale we like to tell to novice or late-to-the-party Survivor fans. It’s a story – feels more like myth now – about a tribe called Kucha in a harsh landscape called the Outback. This is pre-Russell Hantz, pre-Boston Rob, even pre-Tom Westman. This is back in the second season of Survivor, when they had no idea that their initial success would continue nearly unabated for twenty-four seasons, that Richard Hatch and his flabby, hairy, naked figure strolling the beach in Borneo had changed the face of television forever. In season two the show was still in unknown territory, not yet a cultural institution with enough memorable moments to fill a double DVD and enough beloved (and reviled) players to field a competitive softball league. This was a long time ago. But all that time we’ve never forgotten about Michael Skupin. And never gave up hope – despite how unlikely it seemed – that he would return. 

We often relate how this season featured a tribe that we found to be as formidable and as likable (save for Kimmi) as any tribe in Survivor’s prodigious history. It featured a pretty young face that we’d come to later know as Elisabeth Hasslebeck, football wife and The View co-host/conservative punching bag, then going by the surname Filarski. And while Kucha lacked the statistical dominance of Tom Westman’s Koror tribe in Palau, the team felt as strong and cohesive as any tribe, and it was getting stronger and more cohesive after each challenge and Tribal Council. There was Jeff Varner, the good-looking, drawling Tar Heel, and his partner-in-crime Alicia Calaway, who could have easily parlayed her Survivor appearance into a berth in the WWE. There was Old Man Rodger, who had formed such a sweet, good-natured, grandfather-granddaughter relationship with Elisabeth. And there was Nick Brown, the bright, young Harvard Law student. And they were all led by Michael Skupin, a midwest father whose receding hairline was more Bruce Willis than Ron Howard. Skupin served as heart and soul of the team, his intelligence and survival skills keeping Kucha focused and united at camp, his athletic ability pacing them in challenges, and his hunting prowess keeping them energized. With his guidance Kucha was poised to decimate the Ogakor Tribe, which featured such bickering, unlikable players as Jerri “the Black Widow” Manthey, arrogant chef Keith Famie, mama’s boy himbo Colby Donaldson, mama surrogate Tina Wesson, and another pretty face named Amber (yep, that Amber); it was a tribe that fell out of favor with us the moment they voted out Maralyn “Mad Dog” Hershey. Ogakor featured several future All-Stars and a couple million dollar winners, but after five tribal councils they were faltering, fractured and frustrated (Colby dousing Jerri with a bucket of water following a Reward Challenge loss, for example), and with one more Immunity Challenge defeat they were in danger of going into the merge down 6-4 to a Kucha Tribe operating with extreme confidence and bellies full of chickens and popcorn and, thanks to Mike, a pig.

And then, in the blink of an eye, it all came crashing down.

And like that, he’s gone…

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Filed under Be careful what you wish for, Century 21 Reality, Freak Out Control, Mancrush, Tribal Council

‘Survivor: Redemption Island’ Finale: Pawn Stars

Our Redemption Island journey came to an end Sunday night, and while the home stretch of the season had been rather uneventful and predictable, if economical, we still had the chance for fireworks in the last two hours.  Would Rob complete what was unquestionably one of – if not the – definitive Survivor performances, winning it all in his fourth attempt?  Or, perhaps, would Matt fulfill his destiny and return from Redemption Island to become the Sole Survivor (if that was God’s will)?  Or would Mike, the lone remaining member of Zapatera, the double threat of soldier and Jesus lover,  reenter the game and lockup votes from his former teammates?  Or would Grant, the remarkable physical specimen, go undefeated down the stretch, the jury rewarding  his unparalleled athletic prowess with a million dollars.  Or, finally, would Andrea prove victorious in the final Redemption Island duel and surprise us all by going all the way to the end?  Well, there’s no way that could happen, right?

Wrong! But could anyone possibly stand in the way of Boston Rob???

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Filed under Analysis, Be careful what you wish for, Century 21 Reality, God Laughs, LOST, Masochism, Tribal Council, You Decide

‘Survivor: Redemption Island’: The Sweet Taste of Crabs (Director’s Cut)

So this week we entered the post-Russell Hantz era.  And for those of you who complained that Russell was a sneaky, nefarious player who only made it to the finals because he had no chance to win, and that his dominance was a product of editing, and that he was a bore and boorish, well, do you miss him now?  Because, say what you want about the guy, there’s no denying that he made things interesting.  Which is perhaps something you can’t say about last night’s Survivor

Keep reading: Phillips say the darndest things. Plus: Tetris! Rubix Cubes! A giant maze!

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Filed under Century 21 Reality, Growing Pains, It's gross., Tribal Council

‘Survivor: Redemption Island’ : The Dominoes Fall (Director’s Cut)

Imagine waking up in a beautiful seaside location, the crashing waves slowly lulling you out of your slumber, the faraway echoes of exotic birds gently coaxing you out of dreamland, a warm, refreshing breeze serving as nature’s alarm clock.  And then imagine waking up after nine hungry days in a hot, humid, bug-infested jungle and the first thing you see is Phillip’s nasty, tattered, ill-fitting, sun-faded red underwear.  Because that’s exactly the waking nightmare for the members of the Ometepe tribe as we begin this week’s Survivor: Redemption Island.  Any momentum they had after defeating Zapatera last week is immediately erased by the actual sight of Phillip’s junk escaping from his delicates, forcing the Survivor editing team to employ their best blurring skills.  But, to Phillip’s credit, he seems entirely comfortable just flapping in the wind.  And completely oblivious.  But since we’re watching this from the safety of our couch (and, thankfully, with the strategically placed blurs intact) we’re not complaining, because, besides Russell, Phillip is the most entertaining player on the show.

Simply put, it’s put up or shut up time for Russell.

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Filed under Be careful what you wish for, Century 21 Reality, It's gross., Tribal Council

Gratuitous Search Term Bait of the Day: You Look Wonderful Tonight

In just two short weeks Survivor competitor Phillip has already become a legend on this blog, taking his spot in the Jumped the Snark Hall of Fame with Tom Westman, Rashida Jones, Jason Sudeikis, Anderson Cooper, Guy Fieri, Jimmy Fallon and Tom Hanks.  So it’s no surprise that one of our top search terms today was “survivor phillip.”

We talked about Phillip at length in last week’s Survivor recap and posted the clip of what will probably be his signature Survivor moment – hunting a crab with a spear clad only in his cherry red skivvies – but here’s a very quick moment of Phillip at his creepy, confident best (and a gratuitous cleavage shot) from later in that show.  We weren’t able to include it the first time around, but we’re pleased to bring it to you now.  Thanks for the second chance, everyone!  Redemption all around.



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Filed under Count Bleh, Gratuitous Search Term Bait, Tribal Council

‘Survivor: Redemption Island’: I’m Good Enough, I’m Smart Enough, and Doggone It, People Like Me (Director’s Cut)

We started this week’s episode of Survivor: Redemption Island with our first glimpse of, well, Redemption Island.  After being voted at the first Tribal Council, Francesca arrived at her new home and quickly found a signpost describing life on the island, “Welcome to Redemption Island: No Smoking, No Yelling, No Swearing; Daily Menu: Breakfast – Rice; Lunch – Rice, Dinner – Rice.”  Francesca can’t find a flint, so she’s worried about freezing during night, but really she’s just happy to be away from Former Federal Agent (?) Phillip.

Read on: Phillip remains an emotional, delusion wreck, but we get a glimpse of his primal side. Plus: Ralph defines dumb luck, carnival games return, and Boston Rob contemplates the chess board. Also, crabs!

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Filed under Analysis, Century 21 Reality, Good Humor, The Worst, Tribal Council

Ladies and Gentlemen, Your Next Movie Star (And He’s Just Like Us)

As if Jason Sudeikis needed to endear himself to us even more, he went on Conan last night that and showed that he’s into the exact same things we are: beer and wings.

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After the jump we detail our very personal experiences with Natty Light and Buffalo Wild Wings

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Filed under Count Bleh, Intersection of the venn diagram of things that I love, Local Flavor, Mancrush, Talkies, The Sixth Taste