This (semi) daily feature is explicitly designed to give the people what they want, to basically sell-out to catch a few new readers. But today’s post goes beyond our usual pandering, basically equating this blog to your typical trashy, exploitative rag. But, hey, turns out we’re not above that (or this).
Nearly all of today’s search terms referenced Survivor: Redemption Island. But instead of giving you another Phillip-centric post (which you will get later), we’re going to go with another term. Quite simply: “survivor kristina boobs.” Let’s be honest, this is pretty much the reason the Internet exists.
Pleased and a little puzzled by today’s search term “”jenna fischer.”” Pleased because we think she’s just terrific, the modern-day Kelly Kapowski. And puzzled because the term appears with the quotation marks (hence the extra set above). We guess those out there in web-land just wanted to make sure they didn’t wind up with Jenna Elfman or Carrie Fischer. Fortunately, on this blog that’s very unlikely (well, much more likely now).
We’ve sung Fischer’s praises for years for her portrayal of the loveable, dorky Pam Beesley on The Office. And we’re thrilled that she’s gotten her first big movie role , as Owen Wilson’s understanding spouse in Hall Pass (unless you count her part in Walk Hard. Which we’re not). But tonight we’re going to highlight one of her lesser known early performances, one that significantly enhanced her position on the Judd Apatow Chart. We’re talking about her somewhat scandalous turn on Apatow’s Undeclared, a saucier side of Fischer we’re not used to seeing:
And while that was her most memorable appearance on the show it wasn’t her first, as she actually appears briefly in the pilot episode. Talk about starting off on the right foot.
One time about five years ago our friend texted us “Jenna Fischer on Undeclared. Ha.” To this day it’s still one of our most cherished texts.
SO! Today’s search term is “muppet of dolphin.” And, as the title of this post indicates, we have no idea what that means (maybe it’s late and we’re tired and in the morning it’ll make sense, but not now). So, here’s our best guess to approximate what you out there might have been looking for.
Our favorite Dolphin related scene!
A video featuring Lew Zealand, a Muppet whose trademark is throwing fish!
In just two short weeks Survivor competitor Phillip has already become a legend on this blog, taking his spot in the Jumped the Snark Hall of Fame with Tom Westman, Rashida Jones, Jason Sudeikis, Anderson Cooper, Guy Fieri, Jimmy Fallon and Tom Hanks. So it’s no surprise that one of our top search terms today was “survivor phillip.”
We talked about Phillip at length in last week’s Survivor recap and posted the clip of what will probably be his signature Survivor moment – hunting a crab with a spear clad only in his cherry red skivvies – but here’s a very quick moment of Phillip at his creepy, confident best (and a gratuitous cleavage shot) from later in that show. We weren’t able to include it the first time around, but we’re pleased to bring it to you now. Thanks for the second chance, everyone! Redemption all around.
Before we get to tonight’s Idol, we’re going to continue with our Saved by the Bell themed Gratuitous Search Term Bait of the Day, this time working with the familiar search term “community anthony michael hall.” But, once again, we’re going to put a Bayside twist on this, and to do so, let’s play a little word, or concept, association. Where does Community take place? Well, at a community college, of course. And what’s a broader word for “college?” How about “school?” Sure, school. And when we think of Anthony Michael Hall and school what comes to mind? The Breakfast Club, of course! And where does that movie chronicle? A day of detention! And where have we also seen a day of detention? Why, in the Saved by the Bell season episode literally titled “Day of Detention.” Boom! Six degrees of Saved by the Bell.
So, now, as you might have guessed, here’s a brief but colorful clip from that memorable day:
And, remember, don’t confuse this episode with “Senior Cut Day.” It’s an easy mistake.
In an effort to continue with this week’s Saved by the Bell theme for our Gratuitous Search Term Bait, we’re going to put a new twist on a classic, that being “tom westman.” As Survivor‘s elder statesmen, Westman was a strong, reliable father figure, a role model for the younger contestants. He conducted himself with dignity and honor, showing respect and compassion for others. Just playing the game the right right way. And the guy looked pretty damn good in a beard. Which reminds us of someone from Saved by the Bell. No, not Mr. Belding. But Mr. Derek Morris, as played by the terrific John Sanderford. Here he is, like Westman in a salt and pepper beard, in his standout Saved by the Bell moment, educating Zack on the dangers of drunk driving, doling out equal parts wisdom and love. We’re just going to stand back for a moment and let Sanderford’s work speak for itself.
Do they give belated Emmy’s for “Guest Actor on a Saturday Morning Sitcom?” Because they should. For this.
We’re inclined to make this an all Saved by the Bell week of Gratuitous Search Term Bait of the Day, in celebration of finally finishing our (prolonged) SBTB marathon. We don’t know what Tuesday through Friday will hold, but we’re going to start off in that direction with today’s bait “nurse jennifer saved by the bell.”
If you’ve already read our Saved by the BellSeason 2 semi-live blog you’ll know that, despite our eternal affection for Kelly Kapowski, we’ve also always harbored a crush on Nurse Jennifer, as portrayed by Nancy Valen in the episode “From Nurse to Worse” (oddly enough, if we had to name five girls that we had a thing for as a young man, the list might include three ladies from Saved by the Bell: Thiessen, Valen and Rena Sofer, who played Zack’s love interest in Hawaiian Style). It was a very brief role, but Valen left an indelible impression on us, a lasting impact that stays with us today. Indeed, we remember Valen more for her turn at Bayside than her one season on Baywatch. And normally we hated any of Zack’s love interests other than Kelly, abhorring anyone who might get in the way of their eternal happiness. But this particular time we didn’t mind so much. We weren’t happy that Zack was risking his relationship with Kelly for Nurse Jennifer, but we certainly couldn’t blame him.
We mean, c’mon, what sophomore wouldn’t fall for this school nurse? (just another example of how everything was better at Bayside)
One of our favorite pastimes on this blog is noting the preponderance of Crocs on Top Chef, so it wasn’t surprising to see today’s search term, “top chef crocs.” But this All-Stars season has been disappointingly devoid of the rubber footwear (as well as tattoos, which had become a recent Top Chef signature look). But luckily Season 9 court jester Angelo has provided us a worthy substitute.
As we touched on yesterday, in last week’s food meets fashion Quickfire challenge Angelo did his best to make pineapple skin look like a crocodile skin purse. Unfortunately, Angelo ran into two problems, 1) it looked disgusting, and b) he doesn’t know how to spell “crocodile.” Sorry, Angelo; the first rule of Top Chef is you don’t talk about Top Chef; the second rule is that you know how to spell crocodile. The third rule of Top Chef is that you don’t tell Issac Mizrahi that Roberto Cavalli is your favorite designer.
No, we’re not talking about the Mighty Ducks 3 (although we kind of wish we were), but rather the upcoming third season of Adult Swim’s Delocated, as today’s search term is “will there be a delocated season 3.” Well, kids, as we reported last month, the answer is YES! Shooting starts this spring and hopefully we’ll see new episodes before the end of the year. But we’re happy to offer you a special exclusive behind the scenes look inside the Delocated Season 3 writers’ room:
Vodpod videos no longer available.
And more good news: Delocated creator and star Jon Glaser’s new book My Dead Dad was in ZZ Top was released yesterday. The book, a collection of “100% Real,* Never Before Seen Documents from the World of Rock and Roll,” is inspired by one of Glaser’s live bits, the act that gives the book its title. Glaser celebrated the release of the book at Brooklyn’s The Bell House last night with readings from the likes of John Hodgman, Scott Adsit, Paul Rudd and Jon Hamm. Here’s Rudd delivering one of the book’s entries, complete with his best Jay Leno impression:
Do yourself a favor and pick up the book. Makes the perfect Valentine’s Day gift for that special someone.
Jumped The Snark 