Well, after posting a quick Jason Sudeikis clip yesterday, we might just go ahead and make this Jason Sudeikis week because, apparently, he conquest of attractive female SNL hosts has taken him from January Jones to Scarlett Johansson. Pretty impressive stuff to be the rebound from Ryan Reynolds.
Curiously though, whereas Sudeikis and Jones had several moments together during her episode (sketches that Sudeikis basically carried her though, no doubt winning her over in the process) Johansson and Sudeikis shared very little screen time together during her last hosting turn in September. In fact, if we’re not mistaken this is the only instance in which they appeared in the same sketch:
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But, then again, the guy’s got moves. It’d be no surprise if Scarlett fell for him in those few seconds.
So if this doesn’t work out who’s next? Betty White? Emma Stone? Which is the lesser of two evils?
So before Tony Danza was selling himself to Michael Cera and Martin Starr, he was selling out in commercials for third tier diet colas. And not only that, but he had absolutely no reservations about stepping up to the plate and teeing off of a thirteen year-old girl. Tony, we understand that you want to help the team, but that’s straight up cheating. At least put a wig on, Ladybugs style (actually, that would have been a good Danza movie). But, don’t worry, Tony gets what’s coming to him for trying to bend the rules.
That’s right, a PULLED MUSCLE. Serves him right. Plus a ZING from ‘lil blondie. What goes around comes around, Tony. Next time try playing with people your own size. And your own gender.
Oh, wait, you did. And you got nailed at home then, too.
And that, Tony, is why you should never slide headfirst into home plate.
[Also, we need to acknowledge what a weird drink Diet Rite is. “No salt.” Okay. Was that a big concern? We don’t remember that. Our greater worry is that they’ve replaced sugar (or high-fructose corn syrup) with the chemical-enrichedNutraSweet, last seen in our mom’s CareFree gum circa 1991. Fun fact: Diet Rite still exists! Now with Splenda! (until they replace that, too)]
A rather odd search term today, part of which we understand, part of which we’re not so sure about, as one of today’s top phrases was “jason feeny.” Certainly, we could see why someone would end up on this site by searching for Feeny, as Boy Meets World’s Mr. Feeny (as portrayed by the esteemed William Daniels) is one of our all-time favorites, someone whom we should write about more. We’re thrilled if this is where searching for “feeny” takes you. And we cite the name “Jason’ at least once a week, thanks to our preferred SNL cast member, Mr. Jason Sudeikis. But “Jason Feeny?” We don’t know who that is. So since you get enough Sudeikis on this site (for example, earlier today, for no reason at all), we’re going to devote this post to the distinguished, debonair, George Hamilton Feeny.
In a post we hope to craft soon we’re going to argue that the shows that comprised TGIF (Family Matters, Full House, Perfect Strangers) weren’t entirely terrible. They certainly had their deficiencies, and no one would confuse them with truly smart, groundbreaking television. But they had their time and their place, and we’re important shows of their era. However, the cream of the crop from that block was Boy Meets World, which joined the TGIF line-up in 1993. In fact, it’s probably the only real quality show from that group by most criteria, and while we would accept a case that Full House and Family Matters were lackluster sitcoms, we’ll go to our graves defending Boy Meets World.
Lasting seven seasons, just barely making it to the new millennium, the show (through a few time jumps) followed Cory Matthews from elementary school to college, often reinventing itself in the process. Over its run the show featured new characters and locations, and even a change in comic sensibilities and personalities, but the one constant was Mr. Feeny. He started as school teacher to Corey, his brother Eric, his longtime love Topanga and best friend Shawn, then became their principal and finally their professor. But through it all he was their mentor, their guide, dispensing equal parts wisdom and tough love. So it was fitting then that the series ended with those children, now grown, thanking Mr. Feeny for teaching them, for caring about them, and for shaping them into who they are.
Well, I’m sure you could come up with a couple good answers for this question. Both are good Saturday morning past times. Both can be found in many countries (we assume). Both are two of our favorite things. But what we have in mind is something else. A whatchamacallit.
When we came upon this item in the IKEA marketplace we only thought of one thing: the episode of Muppet Babies in which Kermit and Fozzie find one of these in the basement and the little Muppets use their imaginations to suggest various uses for the gadget, including a microphone, intergalactic cheeseburger maker, dinosaur head, alphabet soup strainer and something called the “Mupp0-Matic” (thanks, Fozzie). And even though Nanny eventually explains the actual use of the item the kids refuse to let their creativity be stifled. To top it all off, the episode is titled “Muppets Not Included,” a reference to the 1987 Steven Spielberg-produced film *Batteries Not Included. What other late 1980s children’s cartoon had such deep subtext, tapping into the cultural zeitgeist? None.
We really don’t know why people have been searching for “50% off first pair of bonobos jan 2011,” but evidently they have been, and we’re a little embarrassed that it’s brought them to this blog. But instead of dignifying bonobos any further, we’re going to offer up a Friday bonanza, three pants related sketches starring Michael Ian Black, who seems to have some sort of predisposition for slacks and sweats humor.
To start, “Pants,” perhaps the first great sketch from The State:
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And two more pants-centric sketches from Michael and Michael Have Issues:
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This reminds us, we really should get a pair of sweatpants with pockets. So useful.
Die Hard 2 (Die Harder) was pretty disappointing on all fronts, basically a Die Hard rip-off in the vein of the later Die Hard on a boat andDie Hard in a tunnel and Die Hard on a zeppelin copycats that would densely populate the 90s, as opposed to a worthy follow-up to the original. But most dismaying was the severely diminished presence of Mr. Reginald VelJohnson, who undoubtedly stole the show as Sgt. Al Powell in the first film. He was John McClane’s confidant, his best friend, his rock, and his savior. It’s no stretch to say that without Sgt. Powell there’s no way McClane ever gets out of Nakatomi Plaza. So it’s nothing short of a travesty that Reginald VelJ’s role in the sequel was limited to a desk-jockey cameo:
But in his two minutes on-screen VelJohnson shines, giving a Masters class on eating a Twinkie while talking on the phone. And this scene really breaks down what an exciting, tumultuous time the early 90s were. Fax machines! Insurance companies! The ol’ in-laws! Fax numbers! Pissing in pools! It truly is a snapshot of 1990.
WAKE UP AND SMELL THE 90s! It smells like VelJohnson!
(Completely Made-up Fun Fact: the role played by Samuel L. Jackson in Die Hard with a Vengeance was originally written for Reginald VelJohnson to reprise Sgt. Powell. Strange, but not true!)
One time Bobby Tisdale bought us a drink. He was super nice. He’s one of those people about whom you think to yourself “that guy is super nice.” So watch him on Late Night kicking the hell out of stuff, putting life and limb in jeopardy for our amusement.
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Good thing Jimmy stood back. Wouldn’t want him getting injured like that time Kimbo Slice came by.
Jumped The Snark 