Tag Archives: Live! with Regis and Kelly

You Can Only Run For So Long: Regis Finally Takes Out Regis

Well, as much of a danger that Regis Philbin has been to himself and others over the years, it seemed that the only one who would ever get Regis off his hosting stool was the Grim Reaper.  However, Death can relax (for now), since Regis announced today that come late summer or fall he will leave the Live! after twenty-five years (twenty of which he was there mentally.  Fascinatingly, it wasn’t a consecutive run).  We can only assume he’ll spend his retirement yelling about the Yankees and Notre Dame, butchering people’s names, forgetting what he’s doing, making unintentionally lewd remarks, making intentionally lewd remarks and lacerating himself with a box cutter.  So, no different really.

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But, fret not, after Reege’s announcement it was business as usual:

And apparently ABC ran a little message for Reege right after the show, one that we thought was in rather bad taste.

(that’s an amazing URL, btw)

But, seriously, Regis, mornings will never be the same without you.  Safer and more coherent, sure, but certainly not as entertaining.

So who will fill Regis’ spot next to Kelly?  Anderson Cooper, are you regretting that daytime talk show deal now?  Because we are.

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Filed under Good with Coffee, Reeeeeege

In Regis News We Missed: Reege Still a Danger to Himself, Others

We wouldn’t be doing our job if we didn’t bring you all the news about any injuries or medical issues concerning Regis.  We were there when he announced his hip surgery, and when he nearly gave Meryl Streep a coronary.  And we’re here now (albeit, slightly late) for his latest malady, as he recently sliced his hand with a box cutter, requiring upwards of four (!) stitches.  And to make matters worse, he went back to the ER to get his stitches out (why he went to the ER to have stitches removed, and not somewhere more appropriate, like anywhere else in the hospital, we’ll never know) and they said it was too soon.  CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT?

Meanwhile, while being careful not to steal Reege’s “disability thunder,” Kelly is nursing a hip injury of her own, no doubt caused by all these years of carrying Regis (NAILED IT!).  So this just goes to prove, once again, that Regis is mid-morning talk’s foremost sadomasochist, and no one around him is safe.  NO ONE (Gelman).

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Best News: Regis Resolves to Learn “Twittering” in 2011

Or so he claims during this interview with Paul Rudd from yesterday’s Live!.  This excites us immensely, especially if Larry King’s Tweet output is going to diminish  once he wraps out of Larry King Live (which is tonight, incidentally).  Of course, knowing Regis, his attempts to Tweet will likely involve him punching random buttons on a microwave, trying to complain about how the 2011 Yankees don’t hold a candle to the 1911 squad.

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Filed under Good with Coffee, Interweb, Mancrush, Reeeeeege

Philbin/McHale: Clash of the Titans

Yesterday Joel McHale visited Live! with Regis and Kelly (who themselves are visiting Las Vegas this week), pitting McHale against the source of much of the material shown on The Soup (or, as Regis calls it, simply Soup).  But, much like his recent appearance on Today‘s interminable fourth hour, McHale demonstrated that he has no reservations about biting the hand that feeds him, as he deftly inserted a Regis-is-as-old-as-the-Wright-Brothers crack within the first minute, and continued to harass the irascible Philbin for the entirety of the segment.

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This is something we’ve come to adore about McHale (add it to the list), that he doesn’t make nice with objects of his scorn when he appears on their shows.  Instead, he continues to call them out for their incompetence or insidipity, but still being careful to show appreciation for their existence, as they are the reason he’s able to feed his children (at least until Community came along).  And despite his snark, we can tell that McHale does respect Regis and many of the people he mocks, and I think they in turn admire him for being genuine, sarcastic yet gracious (although, with Regis, it’s hard to tell if he even realizes he’s being derided.  Or that he’s on TV.  ZING!).  So cheers to McHale for being an inveterate smug prick, whether in the comfy confines of The Soup studio or behind enemy lines.

Oh, and Regis revealed his true form.

That explains a lot.

Video courtesy of Gawker.TV.

 

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There are Few Greater Pleasures in Life Than Anderson Cooper Eviscerating a Terrible, Vapid, Parasitic Politician

The guy’s been on a roll recently.

And then he can co-host Live! with Kelly Ripa and be somehow simultaneously delightful and curmudgeonly.

 

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Filed under Count Bleh, Mancrush, Reeeeeege

Reege Returns! No One Gets Hurt!

TV might as well have been broken from December 1 to January 4th, because without Regis it was just about dead to me.  But after his month-long absence following hip surgery the king of mid-morning made his triumphant return to Live!, to the tune of the Rocky theme no less.  They might have his replaced his hip, but let’s hope they didn’t fix his eyes or brain or make him self-aware.  Because a sensible, alert, calm, inside-voice Regis is no Regis at all.  Unless he’s dangerously unhinged, it’s not Reege.

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You can replace hips.  You can replace hearts.  But you can’t replace crazy.

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Filed under Reeeeeege, Talkies

The Regis Philbin Wave of Mutilation Continues

Last week the Regis Philbin runaway train barreled through Meryl Streep, nearly sending her into cardiac arrest when Reege mistakenly informed Streep that her daughter had broken her leg (Just a little error reading the cue card.  NBD.  She’s only the daughter of Oscar Royalty.  Relaaaaax).

Now Reege has once again turned the knife onto himself, as he’ll undergo hip replacement surgery on December 1, followed by a four to six-week recovery and absence from Live!

And now I feel kinda bad.  Like it was our constant warnings that Reege is a loose cannon and is a danger to himself and others that caused the need surgery.  Can’t help but feel somewhat responsible.

Plus, it’s boring without Reege.  Now I’ll have no reason to tune into the show.  Unless, of course, Anderson Cooper guest hosts, because that guy goes Eddie  Murphy Raw when he’s freed from the shackles of prime time cable news into the anything goes of world of syndicated morning television.  No other CNN personality with evidently limited knowledge of popular culture can eviscerate the Lohan family like Anderson Cooper.

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Reege No Longer Just a Danger to Himself, Nearly Gives Meryl Streep Heart Attack

Yesterday I turned the TV tuner to Live! with Regis and Kelly specifically to see if Regis would say something ridiculous within one minute.  Well, he didn’t disappoint.

A few weeks back Regis gave us a very detailed account of his painful battle with kidney stones many years ago, a fight that he thankfully won just before surgery.  On Monday’s show Regis and Kelly welcomed Meryl Streep to the stools and this time Regis decided to stop inflicting pain on himself and turn the cross-hairs on his guest instead.  In a smooth segue, Regis informs Streep that her daughter has broken her leg, nearly giving the Oscar Queen a heart attack as this was news to her.  In fact, it was news to everyone because ol’ Reege just completely butchered the cue card, which actually said that Streep’s daughter “just got her big break.” Just broke her leg, just got her big break, whatever, same thing.

(forward to 2:15 to see the incident)

You really can tell that Kelly is embarrassed, and these days she has to be feeling more like a handler than a co-host.  Let’s face it, the guy ‘s a loose cannon, and he’s going to do some real damage one day.

What makes this extra amazing is that apparently this whole time Regis has been so clueless about names and facts and words and he’s actually been reading cue cards.  Who knows what kind of bad news he would have delivered to Streep if he was left completely to his own devices.  Swine Flu?  SARS?    Black Lung?  Imbalance of bodily humors?

More: What do Kelly Ripa’s breasts, Costco, Charla Nash & Lou Dobbs have in common?

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Oh, Reege! You and Your Kidney Stone Stories!

Once upon a time when I had a job I’d tune into Live! with Regis and Kelly every morning while I got ready for my big day at the office.  I’d only get to catch the first ten minutes or so, but it was often the highlight of my day.  If there’s one part of Live! to take in it’s the first act banter.  Unfortunately, I had to stop watching because I was leaving the house later and later every day.

Lately my schedule is all over the place and I haven’t seen the show in months.  However, yesterday, just by sheer luck (as I got ready for a morning Wii Fit session) I turned on the TV and there were Regis and Kelly, two old friends, a sight for sore eyes.  And fate was smiling on me because they were just having their daily chat over coffee.  Basically you can turn into any episode around this time and hear Regis say something ridiculous, and this was no exception.  However, I think this particular show was a little special, as Reege regaled us with a decades old story of the time he had kidney stones.  What makes this even more amazing is that while Regis cannot remember who is co-host is, he does recall useless details like the name of his male nurse (Jose.  Okay, maybe he made that up).

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He might screw up the name of every guest and point to his chest when referring to his kidneys, but Regis is still the King of Early Morning.

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