Tag Archives: former federal agent

Gratuitous Search Term Bait of the Day: Pushing the Probstvelope

We’re bringing this “daily” feature back after a too long hiatus (mostly because we’ve been busy, but also because our search terms everyday for the last six weeks have all been some variation on “Survivor Federal Agent Phillip”), today working with a non-Phillip term, “www.cbs/jeffprobst.”  Last week on Redemption Island Probst played with fire, just dying for a fine from the FCC and a rash of angry letters from the Parents Television Council.  Luckily, he toed the line, and while it seemed like he was just begging to blunder (a la Jenny Slate), he managed to somehow get out the following challenge commentary without explicitly describing a lewd act (but certainly suggesting it).  We included this in our recap, but it’s worth posting again.  Probst, living dangerously!

Oh, and if you were really curious (although, why you would search for a url, we don’t know), check it: cbs.com/jeffprobst

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Filed under Gratuitous Search Term Bait, Tribal Council

‘Survivor: Redemption Island’: See You at the Cross-Roads (Director’s Cut)

This is it, guys!  Merge time!  And the end of Redemption Island!

Which would have totally been a surprise if they didn’t already tell us this in the preview for this week’s episode.  And they didn’t just tease the game changer, but pretty much announced it.  Which is kind of regrettable, as it took away a potential surprise in the midst of a run of pretty mundane episodes.

Also pretty regrettable – to us at least – is that the producers chose to coincide the merge with the reentry of the Redemption Island ultimate warrior back into the game.  That’s too neat, too obvious, and we reckoned it would be too much all at once.  Wouldn’t have it been more enjoyable, more entertaining if the Redemption Island duels continued while the remaining players vied for Individual Immunity?  In short, in crass terms, our concern was that combining these two moves would pretty much be the equivalent of the show shooting it’s load.  Would that be the case?  We should see.

Keep reading: The Christian, The Sheppard, and The Last Supper

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Filed under Analysis, Century 21 Reality, Tribal Council

We Solve the Mystery of ‘Survivor’ Phillip’s Lion Tattoo

A few weeks ago we posited that the tattoo on Former Federal Agent (?) Phillip’s right shoulder looks more like a pimp than a lion.  But even then we knew there was a better comparison, but we just couldn’t think of it.  It was on the tip of our tongue, at the very precipice of our cerebral cortex, but we should couldn’t find it.  Until now.

It’s Beverly Hills hairstylist and Jackée Harry’s ex-husband to Elgin Charles!  DUH!

See for yourself:

Former Federal Agent Phillip Lion Tattoo

Riiiiight?

Jackée, what do you think?

Well, agree to disagree.

 

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Filed under Tribal Council, What? Too fabulous?, You Decide

We Solve the Mystery of ‘Survivor’ Phillip’s Hurrah; Is This the Key to His Federal Agent (?) Past???

When we heard Former Federal Agent (?) Phillip release a deep, guttural, primitive grunt (twice) during the Survivor: Redemption Island premiere we couldn’t shake the feeling that we had heard that noise somewhere before.

(Also, we really have no idea what he’s talking about here.  Something about male lions sniffing each other and dancing.  Is he divulging a crush on Boston Rob?)

But then it dawned on us.

NHL 93. A body check.  SFX #2.

Does this mean that when Phillip informed his tribe that he was a former federal agent for three government agencies one of those organizations was EA Sports?  Was Phillip, in fact, part of a deep covert operation to provide the sound effects for the greatest sports video game in the history of video games?  Have we uncovered Phillip’s classified resume?

YOU MAKE THE CALL

Sure seems like it.

HURRAH!  AWOOGA!

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Filed under Commodore 64, Conspiracy Theory, Intersection of the venn diagram of things that I love, Tribal Council, You Decide