Can you spot which one of these blond bombshells is a Grammy winning songstress, which one is a deceased female professional wrestler, and which one is a character named Hatchet Face from a John Waters film? Tough, isn’t it???
If you said “I don’t know, I can’t tell them apart,” you’d be right!
Seriously, is there not one person around to tell her that this is not a good look?! Blake? Cee-Lo? Carson??? ANYONE?
Shouldn’t you be in Italy crashing a Fiat into a police car?
Also, the V-Room? We thought Twitter would stop being cool when our dad joined it, but you beat him to the punch. Fuck you, V-Room.
(btw, we’re really enjoying The Voice!)
A little late this week so let’s get right to it:
We get it Gwyneth, you can sing! You already proved it with Country Strong, your appearance on Glee and your CMA performance (and with Huey Lewis in Duets ten years ago). But you had to show us again in your monologue, as Taylor Swift in this My Super Sweet Bar Mitzvah sketch, and by joining meandering songsmiths Kat and Garth on “Weekend Update.’ Listen, Gwyneth, WE GET IT. It’s a wonder they didn’t hold off the “Worst of Soul Train“ sketch another week so Paltrow could play some kind of disco queen. But they probably thought that would be overkill.
Also, Cee-Lo, we get it. You’re a big deal right now. Gwyneth Paltrow covered your hit song, and hugs you and treats you like her best friend. But we don’t need to see the you also singing during the monologue and in the Bar Mitzvah sketch and also appearing in the “Record Label Meeting” sketch that was just a device to introduce your musical performance. What’s that we said about overkill? We mean, c’mon, it’s not like the guy is Paul McCartney. And, sure, we admit, “F*** You” is one of those songs we heard about ad nauseam before we ever actually heard it (much like “Umbrella”), because the only radio we listen to is sports talk and NPR. But it is good, at the very least, it’s dangerously infectious. However, isn’t “F*** You” just like “Hey Ya,” but not as good. Seven years later we still think the former is a great song, not sure if the latter will fare so well in 2018. Will it be a classic or a novelty? Only time will tell if it stands the test of time. But, until then, we could have done with at least one less Cee-Lo appearance.
Read on: Pee-wee plays with fire, Bill Hader gets political, and a hidden meaning to the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air sketch
Get excited for Cee Lo!
And remember, Gwyneth, wipe down your legs BEFORE the monologue.